i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
