Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(850): View more from Florida

You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.

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(661): View more from California

I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.

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(347): View more from New York

Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.

Fav 5 1969 1367
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(778): View more from British Columbia

On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?

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(775): View more from Nevada

Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?

Fav 1 1057 549
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(763): View more from Minnesota

Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?

Fav 2 535 436
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.

Fav 1 753 310
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!

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