Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
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