I love black thongs
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
