Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Randomize
