Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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