I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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