Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
