Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
