North Korea, Best Korea!
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
