No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize