OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
