turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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