just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
