she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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