How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
