i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
false alarm, still single
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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