That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
