her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
tell me about the eggs
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