Kiss
Puke
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
