Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
