Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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