You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
