we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
