that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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