We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
