The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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