that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
