There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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