Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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