i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
