I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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