Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
