it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
