By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
