Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
