i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize