is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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