oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
