i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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