gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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