super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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