i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
