We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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