Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize