8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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