Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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