we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
