so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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