Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
My life is pants optional.
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